For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.

2 Timothy 1:7

Fear of failure, rejection, or the belief of not being ‘enough’, can present itself in many areas in our lives. Instead of letting fear control your life, consider fear as either your prison or the key to your own potential. Living in fear creates a contradiction where you’re dissatisfied with the existing conditions, hesitant to purse a more fulfilling existence.

However, within this contradiction of emotions, lies an opportunity for transformation. When you correctly harness fear and break through barriers to create the life you truly desire. Each individual has their own unique way of approaching life. Discover not only how to cease living in fear, but how to mold fear into a powerful instrument to push you towards your inspirations. At some point, we’ve all have heard ‘Your Test Will Be Your Testimony’.

Types of Fear:

Every emotion that you experience, is an underlying psychology that can work against it. Overcoming fear is not avoidance – it is understanding the human mind of how things trigger certain emotions. Acute fear is a natural response that protects from potential threats to your physical or emotional safety, resulting to quick and life-saving reactions when you are sensing danger. There are times where the acute fear can evolve into chronic, hyper-sensitive, or indirect fear. This happens when we are exposed to low -level stress yet stressful events depending upon the person (news about the war or latest health concerns). Whether you notice it consciously or not, we find ourselves irrational anticipation negative events. Do this sound familiar? Self-sabotaging? Dive into the causes behind your fears, redefine your responses when awareness, and have faith to empower yourself against the persistent influences.

How do you know your living in fear?

You would be surprised by how many people go through life without knowing that their initial responses are based on fear. Many times, people confused fear with comfort – being comfortable with how you think, react, and live. Thinking that you’re happy and fulfilled. Here’s a few signs that you’re living in fear:

1. Perfectionism: The thought of having to be perfect is a mask, a lot of people wear to protect themselves from true connection and intimacy. In today’s world, that’s why many people have a hard time being authentic and owning who they are and how they feel.
2. Settling: This might touch home for some people. Settling for less than you deserve is an indicator that you allow certainty or familiarity run your life. Everyone should pursue having a job they love or a passionate relationship.
3. Procrastination: Are you more afraid of failing or never starting? Delaying your goals for another time is a delay tactic that you’re living in fear. It’s probably time for you to stop making excuses.
4. Numbing yourself: This is very common in today’s modern world and unfortunate to see. When you are living in a beautiful state, you don’t need drugs or alcohol to enjoy all life has to offer. You should be high off life, itself. You experience real joy each day when you’re open to the world, master your emotions, and have a spirit of gratitude for the simplest things.

How to stop living in fear?

Now, this is a question you have to make sure you’re ready to do the inner work. It’s great to get knowledge about information, but what’s more important is application. I suggest grabbing a piece of paper and brainstorm a list. Ex: Fear your house will burn down or your kids go missing. Behind every fear that you come up with…has deeper roots that require self-reflection to find peace.

1. Determine the source of your anxiety: When you live in fear, your anxieties can escalate to a point that they’re running the show. Stop thinking about your worries but be mindful as what’s behind them. You have to pinpoint what exactly causes you distress.
2. Recognize that life happens for you: God is always working in your favor. Relinquishing the blame game and acknowledge your role of mastering your own destiny. Having the perspective of the positive opportunities rather than obstacles, loosens the grip fear has on you.
3. Stop making excuses: Excuses is avoidance of facing your problems or conversations. It’s easy to push aside your desires and hopes when you have excuses. Some people might find it comforting. Being discipline and honest should be normal. Excuses are comforting when you’re living in a fear mindset and not holding yourself to the accountability you need to accomplish your hopes and desires.
4. Growth mindset: If you based your current abilities, knowledge, or experience on where you now, you’ll give up on what you truly want. Living in fear and settling in your life, thinking that you will never attain the goal, so you don’t even try is saddening. Majority of successful people, have the growth mindset by thinking their abilities are flexible. So when you go through a setback, push harder, and adjust your strategy to find the solution.
5. Pain brings insight: Pain is something everyone has experience at some point in their lives, whether it is mental, emotional, or physical. However, painful experiences are only to show you what you want and don’t want in life. So what? It didn’t work as you expected. What are you going to do about it now? We are all built to adapt, so embrace your inner strength and use the experience to help you learn more about yourself and what you really want in life.
6. Self-Care: Being aware of your emotions and changing your mindset to abundance. You have to take care of your mental and emotional state of being; whether you start with a walk, find someone that gives good counsel, or surround yourself with people that support you.
7. Being present: Whether you’re living in the past or the future, be present. Majority of times your past mistakes and experiences can affect your future decisions. Living in fear of what could happen, you can forget to enjoy what is currently happening. If you live in the past of reconnecting with people God removed out your life or reminiscing. If you live in the future, with surfing the internet by fantasizing your next vacation or relationship. Put your phone down and stop missing your life. Pick up new sport or meet people in the now. That’s one thing I can say I would love about experiencing life in the 90s, it was a time of being present.
8. Failure is going to happen: It is a part of the journey, that you will fail. Any successful person can tell you that. However, failure produces insight and corrects any approaches you may have. There’s no teacher or lesson that can teach you besides life experiences.

Keep thriving, growing, and loving!